Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Levels of Friendships

I have a friend who opens her home weekly for a playdate; other moms and their kids come regularly and fill the house with laughter, cries of "Mine!", toys, and muffin crumbs.  She cancelled the other week just to give herself some space, and now has moved to having it every other week instead of weekly.

I admire her desire to connect with these other ladies, and to provide the social outlet for her kids.  She commented to me, though, that while it has been good, she finds herself limited in the time she can spend with other people; as a mom to 3 little ones, she only has so much time to socialize.  While the playdate makes sense to maximize on that, it also makes for shallower conversations, and may not include the people she has a deeper desire to spend time with.

So - a good thing taking place of the best thing, maybe?  I think her decision to cut back is a wise one, and I wish her the best in discovering who her heart longs to connect with, and the time to do that.

What about you?  Are the people you spend time with the ones you have decided are the ones that are most important to you?  Or are they the ones who you just default to because you have kids or programs in common?

Can I challenge you to think about who your most important relationships are with?  Do you have two or three people that build you up and that you really enjoy?  Do you have two or three people that you know you can (or should be) influencing?  Does your schedule show that you have time set aside to build these relationships?

After that conversation with my friend, and because I have chosen 'Relationship' as my word that I'm going to focus on this year, I sat down and thought through my relationships.  I wrote down seven names of people that I want to make time for, and intentionally connect with.  I have friends who are not on that list; they are important to me and I would not turn down a chance to spend time with them, but for these seven, I want to ask myself weekly, "In what way have you connected?"  Some I don't see too often because we live too far apart, but even a quick text to say I'm thinking of them counts for something.

Tell me:  Do you have a chosen few?

May you be intentional about setting aside good for best, and may you connect today with someone who leaves your heart smiling.

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